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Summary: After a certain incident leaves Marco badly wounded, Jean realizes just how much Marco means to him. But is it too late to tell him how he actually feels? Contains spoilers for episode 13 of the anime. JeanMarco.


**Hi, thanks for checking out my story! This is my first time writing a fic for JeanMarco, but I like the way it turned out. These two are so easy to write! I love those adorable dorks**

 **I will say that it contains some spoilers for episode 13 of the anime (I don't know when it happened it the manga, sorry!) So read at your own risk. If you haven't seen that episode yet, you should probably wait. More than likely you don't want your fangirl heart to be crushed by reading some degenerate teen's fanfiction before actually watching it happen.**

 **I apologize in advance for any grammatical errors.**

 **Enjoy!**

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I was frantically pacing back and forth in the infirmary's waiting room. I ran my fingers through my hair impatiently. How long would it take? I had been here for hours without so much as a word, and I needed answers. I needed to know that he was okay. I needed to know that Marco was okay.

When we had split up earlier while fighting the Titans, Marco had been injured. Badly injured. He had been injured so badly that when I first found him I almost mistook him for someone else. But then I did recognize him, and I'll never forget what I saw.

The key thing that stood out was his freckles. His freckles was what made me recognize him when it was nearly impossible to. His face was as white as sheet and his freckles stood out more than ever. His skin was so pale that it almost appeared to be translucent.

"M-Marco, is that you?" I had muttered more to myself than to him. I stepped closer so I could get a better look.

The right side of his face was gone. I thought it was just my eyes playing tricks on me but no, it was true. It almost looked like his face had been ripped in half. That's when I noticed his right arm was missing as well.

And there was blood. Lots and lots of it. There was so much blood that it was the only thing I could smell. It tainted my vision with that hideous color known as crimson. There was crimson everywhere. On him, on the ground, and on my own hands. I had grabbed onto him and shook him without even realizing it. I think I was starting to go crazy-

I shook my head. I couldn't stop thinking about that moment. I could still see that gruesome scene perfectly, it was as if it had been engraved in my mind. _Hopefully I'll get to see him soon,_ I thought. I had to. Seeing him and making sure he was okay was the only thing that mattered to me at this point. Without my knowing it, Marco had become the only thing worth fighting for in this sick world. Yet I had treated him pretty badly, even though he was always by my side, cheering me on.

That's why I had to see him now. I had to make things right with him. But right now, that didn't seem possible. People were being wheeled in at an alarming rate. Some were alive, some had already become corpses. What if Marco had already become a corpse? What if I never got to see him again? The thought was slowly killing me.

"Sir?" A voice broke through my thoughts. I looked up to see a petite blonde nurse staring at me anxiously. "Were you waiting for someone?"

I gulped. It was time to find out. "U-um, I'm here to see Marco Bodt, unless he's already…" I trailed off, not even able to finish that train of thought out loud.

"Oh yes, Marco! To tell you the truth, he's not doing so well at the moment." She frowned, looking down.

Not doing so well? And what was that look for? Was he about to die at any second? "W-well I really want to see him! I need to talk to him about something!"

She sighed. "Alright, fine. If he is awake and coherent, I'll ask him if he's willing to take visitors right now. If you'll excuse me."

I'm sure it took only a matter of minutes for her to return, but it felt like hours had passed- scratch that, it felt like _hours_ passed. When she came back she had a slight smile on her face. That was a good thing, right? "He's awake right now and seems to be doing better. He says he's ready for visitors."

I sighed with great relief. It was like a huge weight had been lifted from my shoulders. "Thank you so much!" I cried out, running down the hall to his room.

She chuckled. "No problem!" She called over her shoulder.

When I opened the door, I came face to face with a very weak and tired looking Marco. He looked so...broken. No amount of words could describe how broken he looked. There were multiple bandages wrapped around his head and chest. His skin was still as pale as it was earlier when I had first found him. There were several IVs hooked up to him.

Regardless of his current physical state, he didn't hesitate to smile at me. "H-hey Jean," he said weakly, his voice barely above a whisper, "I had a feeling it was you."

After he stopped talking he spiraled into a violent coughing fit. I rushed over to his bedside and patted his back in an attempt to help him. "Easy there Marco, no talking, just rest."

He nodded and leaned back onto his pillows. His face was contorted with pain yet he still tried to smile for me. It made me feel as though a knife was piercing my heart. He didn't care that I mostly had acted like a jerk towards him. He had to be in intense pain yet he still had that goofy smile of his.

I knelt beside him. "So that titan really did do a number on you, huh?" _Wow that's all you could say, Jean?_ I mentally slapped myself. _I'm such an idiot!_

"Yeah, guess so," he admitted weakly.

"How did it happen, anyway?"

"To be honest… I don't really know. I can only remember chasing after a titan, and then after that everything was black. The next moment I woke up in pain and had no clue what was going on." Marco paused for a couple of seconds, a grimace of pain evident on his face. "It's kind of crazy, you know? I thought I was invincible, yet here I am."

I shook my head. "No, don't talk like it's your fault. Of course you didn't think something like that could ever happen to you, no one does. We all like to think that we're safe from a fate we don't want. Besides, if it's anyone's fault, it's mine. I should have protected you, but I didn't." I hung my head down in shame. It was true. I should have done something, anything at all, but I didn't, and it had almost cost Marco his life.

"Y-you really mean that?" He asked softly, his voice containing surprise.

"Of course I do! Why wouldn't I?"

"It's just, most of the time I seem to be bothering you. I figured you wouldn't care too much if I died."

I stared at him in shock. I felt like I'd just been slapped. Did he really think so poorly of me? But why? _Probably because I treat him like crap,_ I thought guiltily. Well, I was going to have to change his thoughts of me. If I couldn't, then I don't know what I'd do.

"Marco, don't ever let me hear you say that again. Of course I would care if you died. You're one of the most important things- no, you _are_ the most important thing in my life now, and if I lost you I honestly don't know what I'd do with myself."

I could see tears welling up in the eye he still had left. "Jean…"

But I wasn't done yet. Not quite. "Look, I know that I've been a jerk to you in the past, but I really have no excuse for it other than that I'm an asshole." I reached over and grabbed his left hand, holding it gently between both of my hands. "That's why I'd like it if we could start over. Like nothing in the past happened. The only thing that matters is the future, and I want to spend it with you. What do you say?"

He silently nodded, tears streaking his cheeks.

"Jeez Marco, don't cry," I said, using my thumb to wipe away his tears.

"I-I can't help it, I just-"

"Shh," I said, kissing him quickly on the lips.

This definitely surprised him. His cheeks were starting to turn a slightly darker color as he blushed.

"Your color's starting to come back," I said jokingly.

He rolled his eye and kissed me again, and this time it was me who blushed.

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 **Thanks again for reading! Don't hesitate to leave feedback- I love feedback.**


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